List of My Job Skills to be Excluded From Resume/Cover Letter

Colorblind
Mild dyslexia
Terrible handwriting
Day-dreamer
Prefer to be "shoes-off"
Born within an average gestation period
Huge Star Wars guy. Huge.
Need to hide cookies from me
Fluent in English only
High tendency to dislike boss and/or job
Liar
Knows the jockey in the sixth
Voted for McCain/Palin
Deep longing to be a pirate & willing to swab a deck to prove it

List of Reasons Why I Don't Have a Facebook Page

I am not an aspiring e-pedophile
The ridiculous phrase "social engineering"
Gives people the ability to learn more about me
Maintenance of page would encroach in to valuable beer drinking time
I have no good pictures of myself on this computer
Too busy trying to fight the endless dust in my apartment
The respect of Tom Kramer

List of Games to Play During Your Bar Crawl along the Triangle of Awful

Count the toothless
Utica Club chug contest
Closed factory count
Worst zoo

What is the Triangle of Awful?

List of Places I Would Rather Be Right Now

The home of Blazing Sitars, having coffee
Dane Cooks funeral
The back stairs of the Ithaca College library
Signing the contract for my frame store in Malta
In a U.S. Mail plane, circa 1928
Golfing with D-rod
In a swimming pool of Mr. Pibb
Moving the Home Run Clock to its new destination
In a painting with Alexander Hamilton, and some other cool Federalists

I am not in Jail, well, not in the traditional sense

Hey there Stun Guns (this is the name i give to the loyal readers. I don't know why. It may not make sense. But this is the first you have heard of it, so please move on.) Sorry i missed 2 weeks. The man tried to shut me down. There's more to it, but its kind of a Denise Richards situation.

We can talk about it over our next Stunning cocktail.

Special shout out to Blazing Sitars who encouraged me to make the effort and get a post up - you have not lost me. I am not incarcerated...at lease not in the traditional sense.