List of Reasons Why I Choose Not to Write a Stunning List Today

Too tired
10-Cent Superfectas don’t pay well, and I'm looking in my couch cushions for coffee money
There is mud in my ear
The interns are no longer taking Stunning List dictation notes
My inability to grow a moustache has me sad
Still upset about losing $120 on flip-cup over the weekend

List of Named Fake Moustaches I Have Worn

The Casanova
The Rouge
The Bandit
The Scoundrel
The Smarty

List of Things We Need for a Successful Bastille Day

Rifles that have never been used
Cheese
Guillotine sharpeners
Reservations at Les Halles
Good tidings from the ghost of Marquis de Lafayette
Tastykakes
Friends from the Third Estate, to congregate with
Arbitrary royal indictments
Irish Spring

List of Words That Make You Sound Smart

Rotunda
Feral
Apiary
Fecund
Infectious
Ameliorate
Pedantic
Obfuscate
Temul
Stunning

Try to use them all today.
Perhaps all of them in one super-smart mega sentence.